Kumquats: Greg

Kumquats by Greg Manata

“In the morning I eat kumquats.”

“Is that right?”

“Yes, that is definitely right.”

“Do you only eat kumquats in the morning?”

“Yes, I only eat kumquats in the morning.

“That’s interesting because I eat kumquats at any time during the day.”

“Okay, well that’s your own personal choice. I certainly only eat kumquats in the morning.”

“There must be some reason in particular that you only eat kumquats in the morning…”

“In fact, there is a reason I only eat kumquats in the morning.”

“I’d love to know said reason.”

“Great, because I was planning on telling you. I only eat kumquats in the morning because I am on a strict diet.”

“Diets are goofy things that I would never consider.”

“I see.”

“I didn’t mean to upset you by saying that though. I’m curious about your diet.”

“I can tell you about my diet, if you’d like.”

“I certainly would like that.”

“Very well then. My diet is very strict. I only eat kumquats in the morning. I don’t eat anything else in the morning and I don’t eat kumquats at any other time of day. I actually don’t eat anything else at any time of day except for at 6:45 PM I have a kiwi and a bit of frozen turkey. I wash that down with a refreshing glass of iced tea.”

“That sounds very harsh; how long have you been on that diet?”

“A few days now.”

“How long are you planning on continuing with that diet?”

“Just a few more days I suppose.”

“I see. Did a doctor choose this for you?”

“No, not at all. I just come up with these things by myself. I’m convinced that they are the reason I’m still alive at 105 years old.”

“Holy cow! You’re 105 years old? You look 40.”
“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. I guess I should get going; I need to use the restroom. It was nice meeting you.”

“Nice to meet you as well.”